My Happy Place

Beautiful green park, lush green grasses, the smell of freshly bloomed daisies, birds on the branches of the trees singing sweet songs and there I am resting my head on this person with an ice-cream in my hand. That Person is none other than my mother.

Everyone is blessed to have a mother; people say god couldn’t be everywhere so he made mothers take care of us. My mom, however, taught me differently, she told me to look for god in people and the good deeds they do, she told me God is in every human and in every being but to me. The greatest god I found was in my mother. Like I said every person is blessed to have a mother, but I was a bit extra blessed for I wasn’t an easy child to deal with. I still remember how I used to cry every day while going to school, my mom would just hold me close and would tell me “Sneha, if you be a good girl at school today I promise we’ll go to the park and we’ll have your favorite ice cream” That would make me survive 6 hrs of school, every time we’d go to the park the clumsy mess that I am I’d just trip and fall and cry. my mom would appear to me like superman to help me get up and put a band-aid on my scratches and wounds.

Years passed, and even today we still go to the park and eat ice cream, except now she’d tell me to watch my weight, though she loves to see me eat. But it isn’t always rainbow and sunshine in life, there are times when the dark clouds hover over you and put your loved one through distress. I remember that October Friday when I had my computer exam which went bad. Being a bright student all my life, I felt that this was the end of the world but little did I know that there is something worse than a bad exam. My mom was coming back from my cousin’s wedding and was supposed to reach home by the time I returned from my school. All I wanted was to hug her and cry my heart out like I always do whenever something wrong happens. But when I reached, I couldn’t find her. I was taken to my native place as soon as I came home. There I learned that unfortunately, the bus met with an accident. Luckily, she survived. I was extremely shattered that right my mother lost her arm, but the lady sitting next to her lost her life. To this day I don’t know if I should curse God for putting my mother through such pain, or should I thank him that he didn’t take her away from me. The funny thing is, when I saw my mom in the hospital she said “Thank god Sneha didn’t come with me cause of her exams, she’d be sitting beside me if she did. I can get over losing an arm, but I’d to lose my most precious treasure if lost my only daughter. That day in the hospital, I was unable to see a strong lady like her helpless yet pretending to be fine so that I am okay.

They say time heals everything, and it does to an extent. We move on live with things that make us happy, but a part of me still wishes if only I could be there to but a band-aid on my mother’s wound like she always does. if only not everything was beyond our reach. I was scared that after the accident, I won’t see the strong woman I always knew. But there was a point in my engineering 1st year when I was bullied by my seniors. I didn’t want to give her my problems as an additional burden so I never expressed my uneasiness. Yet she could sense what I was feeling. The next thing I know was having her in my hostel door to know about my problems. I poured my heart out and she helped me face the situation. I realized that she is still the wonder woman I always knew and circumstances made her stronger than before. She is my strength when I am weak, she is my courage when I fear most, she is my entertainment when I am bored, she feeds me when I am hungry. She can take any form to protect.I still love how my mom used to love painting, but she can’t anymore cause of her missing arm. She says it is okay as she found colors in life and family, not on a canvas. But still, if I could see the smile that painting puts on her face again. I am glad she found colors in her life, but I’d be more than happy to find those colors coming to play in her paintings. She is someone I always look upto. She is My Happy Place.

– Sneha Kamath