everything will be all right

Self-doubt? Not getting the respect you deserve? Being adversely judged? Feeling excluded? Mistreated? There are plenty more of these that affect any individual and create setbacks or states of mind which eventually lead to anger and resentment. In all reality, all of these issues are the constants everybody has to face in some part of their picture-perfect lives.

So, keeping aside the perpetual problems, when are we going to talk about the real issues? Not socio-economic or political issues but the “REAL” issues which are affecting me and maybe you too!!!

I think for me there isn’t anything specific which makes me mad but there are a gazillion little things which make me want to scream at the top of my lungs. Brace yourself, dear reader, for I’m going to take you through a journey of how I say, “Kill me God!!!” which I’m sure some of you might relate to.

The pain, Chapter 1: A not so pleasant outing.

It was my parents’ anniversary and we were at a fancy restaurant, just the three of us. It was until this day that I actually noticed something which ticks me off. A middle-aged uncle right next to our table was munching his food in such a way that the entire restaurant could hear him. I think that’s when I experienced the word “Misophonia”. I told my mom how annoying it is and she just pointed her finger toward my dad and little did I know that even he is also one of the conspirators in the slurp noise club.

The disdain, Chapter 2: Websites loading slowly.

This sucks on multiple levels. It actually gives me mood swings, no kidding. Its limits range right from watching a movie online and getting interrupted to constantly reloading the Djvu website. Man, I’ve had it all!!! Imagine, when you come home from a hard day at college and you’re extremely tired, about to have the best meal of the day and ‘It’s controversial’ is not loading for some reason, not wifi’s fault but it’s me who is the unlucky one. It hurts.

The torment, Chapter 3: Oh, my kneeee!!

I’m walking like a normal person and unknowingly I bang my knee on an edge of something in my house. At times I wonder why this table, chair, or sofa exists, and why does it have to be me? It’s funny how I still can’t walk properly in my own house. Keeping aside everything else, the excruciating pain I experience is off the charts.

The disbelief, Chapter 4: All efforts are in vain.

How heartwarming is it when you cook something for your mother and that too on Mother’s Day? It’s a small gesture for all the mammoth tasks she does for us. Hence I decided to make a full meal for her, a bowl of grilled chicken rice with pasta salad. I know right, I’m super fancy with my dishes! So, I did all the prep and finished the dish and it was… not bad. Shhh! the effort counts.

Apparently, she was running late from work, so I thought maybe I can go out for a bit to run some errands. In not less than 20 minutes I came home and the slurping noise club conspirator (my father) was eating what I had made for my mother. For the ghastly crime he had just committed, the response went like, “… make something for her now on Father’s Day” and he left, leaving me lost in the barren land of emotions and pain. I think this definitely caused a strain between me and my father.

Naruto, Chapter 5: Sadness and Sorrow.

This hurts everyone but not everyone expresses it out loud. When you are kind enough to share your food with someone and they just eat a large portion of it and it makes you question their upbringing and your patience. Don’t lie, everybody has experienced this and it is hard to register. This first happened to me at school when I got Pav bhaji and how awesome is it when you get something tasty in school? Moving on, I offered it to some of my friends and that day I lost everything, I wanted new friends. I still haven’t avenged myself.

Last but not least I got some inspiration from my fellow LIT member who gave some calming down advice so here goes nothing: “Suffer for your sins, all of this is happening because you are irresponsible and blind in your own thoughts.”

I hope this calms you down.

Peace out folks!!